Judges 8

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Old Testament

1 Teh Ephraim kittehs sez "U dint called us to fite wif da Kittianites so we no liek u enny moar kthx"2 An he wuz liek "WTF? u rockzorz! Teh cookies u hackd up iz better den r bestest cheezburgerz.3 U gotz deh pimp kittehs Orb n Zeeb so wtfbbq??!!!111oneone". Den dey wuz kewl wid it.

Gideon PWNz Midianites

4 Then teh r0x0r kitteh Gideon, an teh ovr kittens liek went ovr to der an liek got sleepy an stuf.5 Gideon wuz liek: "give liek bred an stuf to mai kit3ns. dem be tyred lulz".6 an the Succothinite kittens were liek: "Gideon kitteh, why shud we help u!?!?"7 Gideon was like: "k w/e, ai cum bak an pwns u layterz, srsly.

8 Then teh Gideon kittehs went to ovr peeps and sed "giv us mice kthx!" but dems sed no too.9 an Giden sed "nex tiem ai c u ai nokk down ur wall, srsly."

10 Zebah an Zalmunna was in karkor wif hol lots doods, but most from dems was alredee teh ded akshully.11 an Gideon went SURPRISE MORTAL COMBATT12 an evryone freekd owt, srsly, and Gideon putted Zebah an Zalmunna in caej.

13 den Gideon wuz goin hom14 an cot yung dood Succoth hoo gav sum naems.

15 Gideon went to topcats an sed "u thot ai wuz noob an not gives fud, nao luk k, cuz ai can has pwned Zebah an Zalmunna NEwai."16 an pwned dems.17 an den pwned ovr doods hoo not halpd too.

18 den sed to Zebah an Zalmunna: "hoo u kill at tabor?" dems sed "o hai sum doods leik u."19 "O NOES! dems was frum mai littr!!! OMFCC, if u had not pwned dems den u wud liv, srsly.

20 an sed to young kitteh Jether "PWN DEM" but Jether has a skeerd21 Zebah an Zalmunna sed "wtf, is U scared Gideon?" an Gideon PWNd dem and taeks all dems stuf.

and teh Israelites sed u rool dood srsly B owr King plz k?

22 an teh israelites sed "u pwned, u b king plz k? an den ur kittehs an dere kittehs k?"

23 he sai no, onlee Ceiling Cat can has b king, srsly.

24 but he sed plz do gives me all moneys from ur N emees. I wantz teh blings dems had, k?25 dey wer all leik totally her u go k. an gav all teh bling.26 it was liek rly hevi. Gideon taek an also comfy cloves too.

27 but o noes, Gideon maek stachoo frum eht bling an isreal worshp it.28 but midianites wuz subdood NE wai and der was harmonee in isreal for Gideons lief NE wai,29 an Jerubball crashd on Gideons sofa.

an Gideon gose Blargh

30 Gideon can has lots wivs and hooj littrz.31 evn wun at shechem, her has boi naem Abimelech.32 Gideon wuz rly old and dyed blargh. an wuz berried at Ophrah (not Oprah, k).

33 an peeps maekd lots stachooz ov baal an stuffs leik befoar34 an totally fourgotd Ceiling Cat35 an wuz even meen to Gideons fambley.

Judges 8
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