Luke 15

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New Testament

Teh Storey Bowt Losted Sheeps

1 Den all IRS d00dz an bad kittehs coem to hear Jebus.2 An Fariseez sez "LOL Jebus etz wit bad kittehs! Him sux!'

3 Jebus sez, "WTF?4 If lolcat had hundrd sheeps an won gits losted, doan him leev naintee nain sheeps an go luk fr losted won?5 Den him find it an iz liek 'w00t!'6 An dem him coem hoem, trow partee cuz him finded losted sheep. Srsly!7 Ceiling Cat moar happi wen a bad kitteh being maed lolcat den bowt naintee nain gud kittehs."

Teh Storey Bowt Losted Muneez

8 "Or if lolcat haz ten muneez an losted won, doan her luk all ovr an up on hai shalf an undr sofa and evrywher til her finded it?9 Den she trow partee wit all her frndz and sez 'w00t! I finded mai losted muneez!'10 Ceiling Cat liek dat wen won bad kitteh being maed lolcat."

Teh Storey Bowt Projijal Kitteh

11 Jebus telled them: "Dis naiz hooman had two kittehs, big kitteh and little kitteh.12 Little kitteh says "i can haz cheezeburger?". So da hooman gives little kitteh cheezburgr.

13 Little kitteh goes out and lookz for gal kittehs and does lots of buttsecks.14 But den therez no foodz anywheres and little kitteh want foodz.15 So little kitteh goed to fish shop and sayed "i can haz fishes?"16 But no hooman luvd little kitteh.

17 But little kitteh thinked "mai hooman haz foodz and luvs kittehs.18 I goes home and getz foodz and warm bed.19 I can getz cheezburgr."20 So little kitteh goed home and his hooman hugged little kitteh.

21 Little kitteh sayed "can i haz cheezburger nao?"

22 His hooman sayed to his Mexican maidz "get naiz warm bed redi for little kitteh nao.23 Get cheezburgr too.24 My kitteh goed away and needz foodz and bedz.

25 Big kitteh was playing outside and smells cheezbugr.26 Big kitteh askd maidz why smell cheezbugr nao.27 Maidz sayd little kitteh comes home nao and eatz foodz.

28 Big kitteh sitted looking away from hooman and wagged tail. Kitteh don't want talk to hooman nao.29 But Big kitteh sayd "i cant haz cheezburgr and i cant haz buttsecks, i hatez yu.30 But you luv little kitteh and he can haz cheezburgr."

31 "Big kitteh", the hooman said, "yu iz old.32 but little kitteh is cute."

Luke 15
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